Thursday, April 5, 2012

One Word Turn-Offs

I realized today, as I flipped through profiles on the online dating site where I am a  member, that I cannot date someone who is unable to spell everyday words correctly. Here is why.

I completely believe in putting your best foot forward. For example, if you have a job (or medical school) interview, you wear an appropriate suit. Not flip-flops, not Bermuda shorts, not a T-shirt. In the online dating world, this means writing a good profile. And by "good" I don't mean Pulitzer Prize-winning writing. I mean something honest, sincere, maybe with a little humor, if that fits your style. But it also means, in my book, spelling things right. If you don't, that suggests one of three things to me:

1) You are lazy
2) You are unprofessional
3) You are uneducated

Or at the worst, perhaps all three. And pardon me if I don't want to be with a guy who is uneducated, unprofessional, and lazy. My standards are a little higher than that at this point in my life. 

As I said, I'm not looking for amazing writing. This has nothing to do whatsoever with content (I won't get into that). But sloppiness, when it comes to language, makes me cringe. Fine examples that I found today (and just today!) include:

- One guy spelled "Chicago" wrong. No, I'm not kidding. I wish I were.

- When he meant to talk about his "role" model, another guy used the word "roll." I realize that homophones (words that have the same pronunciation, but different meanings) can be confusing. But "role model" is a pretty commonly used phrase.

- One profile question asks what you are looking for in a partner. One guy mentioned that he wanted somone funny and "quick whited." I'm pretty sure he wasn't talking about bleached blond hair here ... or was he?

I know this doesn't bother everyone, but words, as well as how people use (or abuse) them, matter to me. And I'm looking for someone who understands that, at least on a basic level.


  1. Hi there! I've been a long time reader of your blog, and also a non-trad pre-med student. I've also been exploring the world of online dating, and I have to say, I agree with this post! Which site are you using?

  2. Hello! Thanks for your comment. I always love hearing from people, so I'm glad you have chimed in on this. And I'm also glad to hear you understand what I'm talking about! The "world of online dating," as you put it, has definitely grown over the last few years. There are many, many sites available. I'd rather not say which one I'm using, just for privacy reasons (I hope you understand). What I will say is that I am using a PAID site, as opposed to a FREE site. I know people who have done the free ones, and their experiences have been much more bizarre than mine. Many people use those free sites as "hook-up" opportunities, if you know what I mean. Not everyone, of course, but that's not what I'm looking for, so I wanted to avoid that at all costs. I will make this suggestion - if you do decide to do a paid site, call the company as opposed to signing up online. I've heard that you get a much better deal that way, and I also had that experience personally - I saved a LOT of money by simply making that phone call and asking what sort of deals/specials they had going on at the time.

    Good luck to you, in both the dating arena and in your studies, and thanks for reading!

    - Lorien

  3. I look forward to laughing with you Lorien, one freaky date at a time, LOL!!!

  4. Indeed! I'm glad you're laughing ... that was definitely my intent. Although I must say, I've also had some relatively "normal" dates, which I haven't written about. It's more fun to write about the crazy ones! ;-)